Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
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