i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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