you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Randomize
