Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
that's an acceptable place to lick
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
And then my night got REAL pukey
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
