were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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