fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
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