her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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