Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I lost the right to judge tonight
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize