if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Found the puke drawer
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
