How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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