I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
