this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Acid is not a monday night drug
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
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