I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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