I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
