Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
