I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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