it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
