i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
im having a threesome with these popsicles
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
