When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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