My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize