If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.