Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
