the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
