Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
we're so committed to being not committed
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
