Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Randomize
