She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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