All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
