This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
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