i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I look excited, but its just a facade.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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