I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
