No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
