Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
