I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
