the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
