my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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