My nipple is on Facebook.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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