K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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