guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Im part way to drunk.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
