He is an equal opportunity slut.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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