community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
this just has baby written all over it
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I love you. Go after that dick
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
