Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
