Where did you get a picture of my penis
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
