How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
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