with your own penis?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
