RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
