somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Randomize