I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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