Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
we have pet lesbian snakes
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
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