FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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