its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Operation Purity has been aborted
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
is that a dick in a sweater?
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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