Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize